As part of my work and passion for people, I study stories and I am mainly interested in the real story of how things happen. Annette’s post on Cypress Springs is a great travel log and it will help you get there and enjoy a beautiful day on the water. However, what she forgot to mention was the narrative that goes along with our journey. That is, she forgot to mention the real story of Holmes Creek and Cypress Springs. Sit back and relax as I replay Cypress Springs, the real story!

The real story begins like this…

As we approached the boat ramp at Culpepper landing, heads began to turn. We drive a white Toyota Tundra, Rock Warrior Edition, with two oversize Big Tuna Kayaks stacked in the back. Compared to the, we will call them, well used, cars in the lot with a handful of rusted canoes on the shore, I am sure we made quit a scene. As I turned the truck around and backed onto the ramp, we instantly drew attention from the church group that was quietly eating their lunch at the picnic pavilion. I eased the truck into park and applied the parking brake and exited the truck. Annette and Canyon, applying the “dreaded sunscreen” were having a great debate about the importance of sunscreen as the church lady approached with Ninja like skills. “Where did you get those… boats?” she asked with excitement. This is my cue to pretend I am busy and Annette’s cue to take center stage and begin the “Awesome Kayak” speech she has given a thousand times.

While Annette was busy with the blue haired church lady, and I was busy with unloading, Canyon attracted the attention of two “boat-dock dogs.” It seems Florida is famous for these dogs and it is as if they are bred to annoy those who are preparing for a day on the water. The dogs usually resemble some sort of mix between a blind pit-bull and an overweight beagle and they always show signs of puppies. You know the style, the under-carriage that barely clears the ground with its cow like utters and brings comments from the children like, “what is wrong with that dog!” Luckily for us, the shirtless owner arrived on a 1976 riding lawn mower and called for the dogs. “Damn dogs,” he says, “they never listen; of course that one there is deaf,” as he points to the scraggly white one. I shake my head and wonder just what have we got ourselves into.

After Annette shook the church lady, and we harassed the three motor boaters that needed a little more exercise and a lot more boat, we finally launched into the creek.

Once on the creek the adventure really got cooking. Instead of giving the story of every person we met, I thought I would give you the top ten people we met. I think it is awesome, and even entertaining. Here is the list:

  1. Gun slinging Jon-boat drivers unloading their weapons on some imaginary beast on the bank.
  2. Oversized people in undersized boats.
  3. Two women in a canoe towing behind them a shirtless, cut-off jean short wearing, beer drinking man yelling… “Don’t let those kayaks pass us!”
  4. Chunky bikini wearing standup paddle boarder.
  5. Shirtless boater advertising his newly acquired tattoo, “Georgia Red Neck” in Gothic font.
  6.  Hoards of people on the beach area proudly and publicly showing their need for P90X.
  7. Teenage kids bravely, or not so bravely, swinging into the beautiful clear water.
  8. Novice boat drivers coming way to close for comfort.
  9. Local kids giving us a hand with our boats and arguing over using their hotdogs for bait or for human consumption.
  10. The church lady (having here second lunch) clearly announcing to the entire spring… “Here comes that nice Christian family!”

All in all this was an awesome trip! I love the people we meet along the way. People are what makes our time on the water fun and adventurous. The places we go are only half the story. The narratives we collect are certainly the second half!

Safe travels! – Troy

PS – If you missed the logistics of the trip see Annette’s Cypress Springs post.

Cypress Spring, Holmes Creek

Author

Troy is a husband, father, outdoor enthusiast, pastoral care provider, scholar, and musician who currently lives in lower Alabama. He seeks to find the answers to life's most difficult questions through his outdoor pursuits and adventures. Troy holds a Bachelor of Science in Music Education, a Master of Arts in Humanities, a Master of Religion in Pastoral Counseling, and a Doctorate of Education in Pastoral Counseling. He is a Board Certified Chaplain through the American Association of Professional Chaplains and currently is the director of the Family Life Counseling Center at Fort Rucker, AL.

Leave a Comment

Be the First to Comment!

Notify of
avatar
wpDiscuz